I do know the rest so I will speak again now.
Life was constant anxiety while Atutxa was away. After one particularly bad night when I got very little sleep I decided to go to the cave and see what I could find out in spirit world. If I could find Leopard she might be able to tell me some news of him. But she was probably busy helping him and I didn’t want to stop her doing that. I had to do something though.
Everything seemed to hinder me in my desire to get quickly to the cave that morning. I shouted to Sinotsu in his shelter where I was going and that he was to deal with any problems while I was away, but it was a long time before I got a mumbled response. Then I had got quite a way before I remembered that I had forgotten to pack the smoking mixture of all things. So I went back for that but finally got down the passageway to my carving of Hare. How glad I was to get through and hug him. He had to gasp at me not to squeeze so tightly, but we were both relieved to sit together quietly for a while.
Mammoth came up then and it was further relief to hug his trunk and tell him of my worries.
"Perhaps you could take me on your back to where Atutxa and Leopard are?"
"You’re not going anywhere in that condition. You’re far too distracted to defend yourself if anything should happen. I’ll go and see what I can find out. You wait here with Hare, though I don’t think you should be in spirit-world at all. I’ll go as fast as I can."
He set off before I could object, but Hare said he was right and we must be vigilant even here. They were right of course as I saw after having had time to think. I felt as though I had been there forever by the time Mammoth returned, though being able to stroke Hare soothed the worst of my nerves.
"Atutxa is fine, in fact I think he has grown a bit. He has just set out from the ice giants’ camping place. The man with him is his father and his name is Groohk. There is a little girl with them, a really small girl, who is called Miklin. She is riding on Tlez with the packs and is Atutxa’s half-sister."
"Oh. Thank you Mammoth. I can’t thank you enough, I should have asked you to help me earlier." Hare thanked him too and he looked pleased with himself, as well he might having had to cross those mountains that I knew he hated.
"How soon do you think they will get here?"
"Oh, I don’t know. It depends on whether Groohk knows a good way through the mountains. Leopard says Atutxa was to-ing and fro-ing there for a long time. With a good route through the passes they could be here in four or five days I would think."
"You’re a real friend, Mammoth."
It was a wrench to leave Hare but I had to get back, not just because of sensibly limiting spirit-world time, there were preparations to make. The next day I would move up onto the tundra and live in my travelling shelter so that I could see them coming and be there to greet them.
I nearly ran, as near as I can these days, when I saw Sinotsu outside his shelter. After I’d got my breath back I told him all about it and asked if he’d mind doing Enchanter’s duties for a few days. He just smiled gently and said
"Go on and get packed. I can cope here, and let me know if I can help you carry your stuff up there tomorrow."
He was so calm about it, but then Atutxa’s not his son and he doesn’t realise.
The packing went badly. I was constantly getting distracted and unpacking to make more space for things, I realise now, it was almost certain I wouldn’t need. If I could only have concentrated.
It was a beautiful day the next day and I set off early. I shouted to Sinotsu that I was leaving. A tousled head came out of his shelter door.
"Do you need any help?"
"No, I’m fine, go back to sleep. I won’t be back until they arrive."
"That’s fine." He looked nearly asleep already, and his head disappeared again.
I stopped in quickly at Mother and Father’s shelter to say ’goodbye’.
Mother smiled uncertainly and said
"Where are you going?"
"I’m going to meet Atutxa, Mother. I told you last night."
"Oh yes."
I knew she didn’t remember, but at least she still knew who I was. Father gave me one of his heart-rending looks and wished me well. He was so good with her. There was nothing that could be said so I left.
Climbing up to the tundra I soon found that my jacket was too hot and stopped to take it off. I was glad of the rest and was almost wishing I’d accepted Sinotsu’s offer of help with the carrying. It took me much longer than I had thought to get up there but I found a very good spot for my shelter on a firm peat hag quite near where we had found Tlez. It made me smile to think how tiny she had been then.
The days passed slowly in my impatience. My traps had never been so well attended. They didn’t produce much though and of course I’d brought up far too much food so I didn’t need what I caught. Drying the meat and preparing the pelts gave me something to do.
It was a little before mid-day on the fifth day that I saw them coming. I was looking the wrong way at first and they were large enough for me to see them individually when I first saw them. Atutxa looked small compared to his father.
When they were near enough I ran, very awkwardly through the heather, to Atutxa. He ran forward too. I didn’t want to embarrass him by hugging, but he threw his arms round me so that was alright. Then his father came up grinning and we hugged too, then stood back to look at each other. He was older but perhaps I would have known him. I read the same thought in his face and then he hit me on the back, he must have been careful because it didn’t hurt, and I did the same to him.
Then Groohk said something that sounded like
"Hello, Kizkur."
I embarrassed us all by bursting into tears.
After I recovered Atutxa taught me ’hello’ in Ice Giant and I responded. Then I called up the strange word to Miklin. When she could stop laughing at my pronunciation she called it back properly. She looked as though she might be going to get down from Tlez but Atutxa stopped her. He had been looking at my temporary camp.
"I suppose you’ve been up here for days. Leopard told me you had sent Mammoth to check up on me." There was no need to say it wasn’t like that, he wasn’t serious. I asked him if he thought Tlez could manage the steep descent, but he didn’t and neither did I. We tried to explain to Groohk that we would pack up my travelling shelter, get my stuff up onto Tlez and then take the long gradual way back to camp, going by Vezeru’s shrine. He could hardly have understood much but signed a sort of ’go ahead all’s well’ gesture.
Groohk looked very interested when he saw Vezeru and made a reverent gesture. I showed him the spring and he nodded understanding. That was a sign we had in common then. He saw the mammoth’s tooth, a bit licheny by this time, and asked if it was the one he gave me. I told him it was. We looked into each other’s eyes and understood each other.
When he saw me give Vezeru a scarab, and Atutxa give her a dried seed head, he extracted an unusual-looking striped stone from a pouch and gave her that.
Oskol was out to meet us as we approached. He hugged Atutxa and then me. We introduced him to Groohk and they had an awkward moment, not knowing whether to touch hands, hit backs or what. Finally Groohk mangled
"Hello Oskol."
in his throaty way of speaking and Oskol responded so they got through it that way. We helped Miklin down from Tlez and she showed that she had been watching by hugging everybody. She wasn’t at all shy about staring at Oskol so he picked her up and carried her back to camp where everybody who could was out to greet us.
The children ran out to greet Tlez, they must have missed her. The adults were trying not to stare but couldn’t help it. I wasn’t surprised, one’s first sight of an ice giant is a shock. Miklin eased the meeting though by being such an open child and hugging anybody who went near her, and luckily her name was easy for us to say.
The new Chief Elder felt it necessary to greet Groohk on behalf of the group. He made a speech, it was a good one really but I can’t imagine what Groohk made of it.
We dropped off Atutxa’s things in our shelter, made sure Tlez needed nothing, then we all went over to Mother and Father’s shelter. They were really too old for getting out much now. They hugged Atutxa, relieved too to see him safely back. Then it was introductions of Groohk and signed explanations to him of all the relationships. I think he understood, it was probably obvious anyway. It certainly would have been anyway when Atutxa gave me back the bear’s tooth ceremoniously and I then gave it back to Mother. She remembered it and didn’t want to take it, but I insisted. Father formally welcomed Groohk to the family which he certainly seemed to understand and accept with a gracious gesture. Then we were all shown Oskol’s wolf cubs which were well grown now and overly boisterous for my taste. Groohk managed to ask why the wolves were part of the family and Oskol got onto hunting. I knew hunting talk would go on forever and went and sat quietly with Mother. Atutxa acted as interpreter, he seemed expert with signs and a few words.
We left after that to get Groohk settled. I was pleased that he put his shelter near ours, but it was too small really for Micklin as well so we put her in ours. She was taken aback by the objects of power and Atutxa explained gently to her that she must not touch them, though if I followed it right she said she wouldn’t dare do so. We had told Groohk to come and eat with us when he had arranged his shelter and we soon heard him making a strange cry outside the door. Atutxa made the cry back, it sounded identical to me, and he came in. Unfortunately the first thing he saw on entering was Ikaseraz’s skull which seemed to frighten him. He jumped backwards and cried out. I was surprised because Miklin had not reacted at all when she saw it. But I gathered my thoughts quickly and threw a coat over it. Atutxa said and gestured very fast something I couldn’t follow and then Miklin’s strange child voice said something which made Groohk smile, though a little groggily. I just smiled at him and urged him to sit with us by the fire, but he insisted on an explanation which I couldn’t understand and what looked like an apology which wasn’t necessary. Then he sat with us and we all ate. The occasion called for mead and we all toasted each other. We gave Miklin a small amount well diluted with water and she seemed to like it. She fell asleep then so I put her to bed in her tiny sleeping furs.
Atutxa and I wanted to show Groohk the cave so I went and found Sinotsu and asked him to sit in our shelter in case Miklin woke up, then we three set out. Atutxa did most of the talking, I didn’t seem to be very good at it besides which I was feeling a bit awkward with Groohk after all these years.
He looked askance at the entrance to the cave but then laughed and wriggled in. He seemed to be very lithe and got through more easily than I did. The paintings obviously took him by surprise and he gazed at them long and hard. He said something to Atutxa who nodded. We took him over to the mammoth and he touched his forehead to it. Then he signed something about painting with a brush. Atutxa said
"He asks if you painted the mammoth."
"Oh, no, no. I painted this one" and showed him my snowy owl. He touched his forehead again and looked carefully at every feather and claw.
"Good." he said and took hold of my hand. With my other I took Atutxa’s and we walked back to our shelter like that
The next day we called at Groohk’s shelter to invite him in to breakfast, but he had already eaten. He came back with us while we had ours. Miklin had been trying all the different food while we were out so she had had enough and Groohk and she played together as Atutxa and I ate.
We had decided to take Groohk on a walk around the area that day and to show him our traps and what food plants grew around here. I had packed up some smooth pieces of leather, small pots of paint and bits of charcoal as a sketching kit in my waist pouch. It was my habit to do that, in case I wanted to sketch something for a later painting, whenever I went anywhere which wasn’t often lately. It would have been nice if Sinotsu could have come with us but we didn’t want to leave the group without an enchanter. Oskol was busy with some hunting business so it was just the four of us.
The traps on the tundra were the first place to go. Luckily Miklin found the climbing hard so we went slowly and it wasn’t obvious how old I was getting. Perhaps I was fooling myself and they were kindly ignoring how slow I was.
The traps had a good catch which pleased me as I wanted our area to make a good impression on Groohk for when he reported back to his group. There was a fox, a sable and several lemmings. The fox was the red/brown one, its fur is nowhere near as dense as the that of the one which turns white in winter, but it is so beautiful that I wasn’t disappointed. The sable was a wonderful catch, they are plentiful here but rarely trapped.
The day’s catch had to be taken back to camp and Tlez came to meet us. Of course we gave her a treat, a honey-cake. Then we had to give Miklin one, so we all had some. It saved carrying any food with us anyway. The next stop was the fish traps in the river and for a wonder there was a good catch in those too. We gutted them and threw the guts into the water. The flesh went into the fish bag and we took that with us as we walked on down the river bank.
At a side stream that we reached later Atutxa wanted to show his father a dead-fall higher up the stream which they used for hunting bison. Miklin was tired so she and I stayed behind and dangled our feet in the stream. They were a long time away so I looked for something to sketch. There were some lovely wet pebbles but I already had several sketches of those. Further along I could see some honeysuckle growing through a bush. It was in full flower, so there were closed buds and some berries, that was a really good find. I settled to sketch and Miklin ’helped’ by passing the paints. We learned each other’s words for the colours at the same time. It confused me to find that they used the same word for both blue and green. It was probably mutual because Miklin seemed to be having difficulty as well and she was very quick with new words.
I had nearly finished when the men got back. They seemed pleased with their expedition to the dead-fall though I couldn’t follow what Groohk was saying about it. Though I recognised the gesture of reverence he made to my sketch. Whether the gesture was for representations in general or specifically for honeysuckle I didn’t know. Between us we conveyed to him that I did sketches so that I had a copy for later painting in the cave.
The sketch was still wet so I put its protector over it and Atutxa carried it for me in his backpack. It was getting late by that time and we turned for home. We decided to return on the other bank of the river to be sure Groohk saw everything which grew along it, so went a little further down the river to where there was a shallow crossing-place. We had to cross back later of course but it was worth it as we had been able to show him the best place for hazel and filbert bushes.
That evening we ate the stew that I had left cooking over the damped down fire and then relaxed for while.
But Groohk couldn’t settle. He was trying to convey that there was something he wanted us all to do, but even Atutxa couldn’t make it out. Then Miklin joined in trying to make us understand but only confusing us further. I made an exaggerated question sign. He looked around and pointed to my pouch and Atutxa’s pack. Neither of us had unpacked yet so the day’s things were still in them. We both took things out one by one and at my first container of paint he nodded and pointed. Then when Atutxa brought out my honeysuckle sketch, which I’d almost forgotten about, he took it with what seemed unnecessary care and put it with the paints, then made a sweep including paints, sketch and all of us and pointed in the direction of the cave. It was clear then that he wanted us all to go and paint honeysuckle in the cave, we wondered why we hadn’t understood before. When we had repacked the pouch and pack, found warm jackets and got Miklin into hers, I just filled a water-bag for us and off we went to the cave.
There was nobody else in there so we could start right away. Groohk had an idea he wanted us to do. His signing was quite clear this time, he was asking if I would paint the honeysuckle under the mammoth’s feet. I was only too pleased that someone had thought where to do it and started an outline in charcoal. The sketch was as realistic as I could make it, but for the painting I would do it more stylised. It was to be the spirit of honeysuckle and I almost hoped that people might think that they could smell it. Halfway through the outline it came to me that it would be much better if Groohk painted it himself, so I signed this to him. He looked alarmed and indicated that he had never painted before. I wanted to sign that there was a first time for everybody but couldn’t think how to. Atutxa came to my rescue with some words and signs and Groohk agreed to try but said I must finish the outlining.
We only had yellow, red, white and black so I had drawn no leaves. A yellowish grey would have been alright but I’d preferred to just do flowers and berries. He looked questioningly at the paints so I mixed up several shades of what I thought would make good pinks and pale yellows and gave him a choice of brushes. He felt them and then tried each on the surface of the cave wall to get a feel for them before dipping in any of the paints. Then he studied my sketch for a long time before deciding to apply colour to the wall. While he was painting the flowers I mixed a small amount of the purple, which Atutxa and I had made from the shellfish by the sea, into the earthy red of the ochre to better resemble the berry colour. Groohk copied techniques from the paintings on the walls as well as my sketch and when the first flower was done we all admired it. I was impressed, it was good for someone who had never done it before. He seemed happy for us to watch him, that surprised me as I don’t like to be watched painting. When it came to the berries I showed him the colour I had mixed and he nodded agreement. He added a touch of black to make a rounded shadow on each and I showed him with a bit of white how to make one shine, he liked that and added it to them all. That was it done and we all stood back and admired it. We all thought it was good, but I had the impression that Groohk was happy that the honeysuckle was there and not so much that he was taking pleasure in his work.
We sat enjoying the new painting and Groohk laughed at the mess he had made getting paint all over his hands. Then he became serious and signed that he must get ready to return to his own camp. It had to be of course but I had been enjoying having him around and Miklin was good company too. If only we could have spoken to each other.
We agreed between us that we would spend the next day making preparations. I wanted to think of a present to send to Miklin’s mother to show that we appreciated her letting Miklin come to us, it was very trusting of her. Miklin could never walk all that way, and it would be awkward for Groohk to carry her on his back through the mountains, so we thought that Tlez should go to carry Miklin and their packs. But Atutxa wouldn’t let her go without him so we agreed that he would go too. I wouldn’t be worried about him with Groohk to look after him, but I didn’t say so because he thought he could look after himself.
The preparations all went smoothly the next day. Atutxa thought that a shell bracelet would please Miklin’s mother as they didn’t seem to have many things from the sea. I could easily make one, but it involved getting Atutxa to go and keep Miklin and Groohk occupied while I did it. I was going to make a small one for Miklin too but wanted it to be a surprise when she got home. They were soon made and wrapped. I put them in Atutxa’s pack, he could be trusted to choose the right moment to give them to them. I didn’t want to embarrass Groohk by giving him anything because I knew he had travelled light and had nothing he could give me. And present-giving might have different connotations among ice giants.
I didn’t want them to leave at all the next day. Sinotsu, Oskol and I went with them as far as the tundra. We went the long easy way for Tlez’s sake and I left my honeysuckle sketch as an offering for our party to Vezeru. The three of us watched them for a long time getting smaller into the distance. Groohk seemed confident that his group would vote to come south to at least try out being with us, I hoped he was right.